Victor and I were engaged on 5/5/5. We got married on Thanksgiving weekend (11/26/05) because my mom was teaching and had very limited time off during the school year. Since we were living in Wisconsin and had many family members traveling hundreds of miles to get to the wedding, December through March were not good choices. Spring break was the next good option but that Saturday just happened to be April Fools Day! Ha! So Thanksgiving weekend it was and we had a really fun wedding.
Anyway, this year the closeness of Thanksgiving and our anniversary, both days set aside to give thanks (hopefully), seem to leave me feeling quite reflective.
My life is so good. In fact, almost everyone I spend time with on a regular basis, has a really good life. Nice homes, reliable cars, stable jobs (although most were furloughed in some way recently), healthy kids, financial security, steady marriages, etc. In fact, there has been an article floating around facebook this week about how the DC area is extremely affluent (a superzip). ( Click here to read...
http://www.washingtonpost.com/sf/local/2013/11/09/washington-a-world-apart/). Of course, if you get on the wrong metro train you will quickly know that lots of people in DC live in extreme poverty.
Despite this abundance of blessings bestowed upon my home and that of many of my friends and family, it somehow seems human nature to focus of the things you don't have/things that annoy you (messy house, not enough sleep, sassy kids, un-perfect spouse, old cars, not enough time by yourself or with your spouse, etc.). It's normal I think to be annoyed with little things at times but sad if the major joy that life holds is lost by focusing on the wrong things.
I've always been fairly optimistic but I am also quite neurotic (still working on that!). So to not get focused on the small, unimportant things that might drive me bonkers and steal some joy from my life (and those who may be annoying me and hearing about it) is something I have to work at daily.
How do we lose track so easily? I don't know. I do know though that
for past two years it's been much easier for me to see the joy in the
mundane. To remember to stop and be grateful for the little things. My
life is so good and I honestly wake up happy and thankful 95% of the
time.
You see, as most readers know, my brother was been fighting cancer for 2 years. Every day he has to fight a battle just to see another day. This battle has been and continues to be really, really hard. His life has been halted in every aspect. I can't say anything good about cancer and I wish with every fiber in my body that his struggles would never have happened and he would be miraculously cured.
That being said, watching Daron fight has taught me a lot about giving thanks. He's amazing (as is his wife). Despite his daily pain and suffering he chooses to enjoy life whenever possible. My life is so good and easy and blessed. I want to live a thankful life, not just during the week of Thanksgiving, everyday.
Back to my anniversary. Today was a fairly ordinary day. I was woken at 6:01 to Kyle's cries over the monitor. Victor had already left for work. All four kids were up already, Lainey was actually in the crib with Kyle - little stinker! I started the day, after feeding Kyle, by doing laundry, unloading the dishwasher, feeding the other three, helping kids get dressed, packing backpacks, snacks and lunches, changing diapers (lots of them), cleaning up the kitchen. At 8 o'clock our neighbor kiddos who are currently "homeless" came over to play for 30 minutes before going to the bus. Our contractor Tim also showed up and had multiple questions for me regarding a locker project in the garage that he was going to work on today. At 8:30 six kids and I headed to the bus stop in the wind, rain, and cold. I was back home by 9:00, fed Kyle, changed another diaper, gathered up library books. Then Kyle, Carson and I ran an anniversary errand and headed to the library. (Does anyone with small kids manage to not owe large sums of money to the library on a regular basis?!) We picked up Lainey at school at 11:40. She was mad that I picked her up and refused to come with me. Apparently she wanted to ride the bus. (I had to laugh because I distinctly recall doing the same thing to my mom at least once.) I took the kids out for lunch and then we came home for naps. Lainey was acting quite tired so I read her books and had her lay down for an hour. Carson was next - he didn't sleep very well - but stayed in his room for 45 minutes. I think I fed Kyle again and then started in on dinner. Yes, at 1:30. Nap time is the best time to make dinner and avoid chaos later in the day. Between 2:30 and 4:00 I worked on a counting project and sight words with Lainey, read more books to Carson and had him do a breathing treatment. Erik got home shortly after 4:00 (my neighbors picked him up so I got to avoid the wind and rain in the afternoon). I chatted with him for a while and fed Kyle again. The trio played downstairs for a bit, while I got Kyle settled down for a nap, and warmed up dinner. We eat early because Erik is starving when he gets home most days and I don't like giving them a snack at 4:30. So by 5:00 the kids and I were eating dinner. After getting the dinner dishes cleaned up or at least organized and the counters wiped down, I played hide and seek with the kids. At 6:00 Victor got home. We said hi. While I was feeding Kyle (see a theme) we exchanged anniversary gifts quickly. I then ran to the gym while Victor put the trio to bed and finished kitchen clean up. After getting home from the gym, I chatted with Victor for a little bit before heading upstairs to write, take a shower, feed Kyle, and go to bed.
Lots of mundane moments on our 8th anniversary but truly I can think of no place I'd rather be. When I got married 8 years ago, this was exactly the life I hoped I'd be living. I'm so grateful those hopes and dreams came true. Not everyone is so lucky.
I'm sharing this today to encourage those reading it, to never lose sight of the many blessings in your life. Life's not easy. Marriage is not easy. But choosing to give thanks and seek joy really seems to be the best option no matter the circumstance. I hope when I look back on my life, I will see that I have done that well.
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