Peace

How would you define peace? This is Webster's definition....

1: a state of tranquility or quiet: as a: freedom from civil disturbance b: a state of security or order within a community provided for by law or custom peace> 2: freedom from disquieting or oppressive thoughts or emotions3: harmony in personal relations4 a: a state or period of mutual concord between governments b: a pact or agreement to end hostilities between those who have been at war or in a state of enmity5—used interjectionally to ask for silence or calm or as a greeting or farewell

I think as a Mom it is uncommon to have moments where you are truly peaceful. Even after the kids are asleep I find myself thinking about all that needs done, how little sleep I am going to get if I stay up to do it, trying to spend 5 minutes talking to Victor without commentary or crying, going to the gym, etc. I know for me peaceful moments are rare. I have lots of nice moments but I would describe them as -- loving, grateful, humorous, etc. Not necessarily peaceful.

That being said, yesterday I was able to capture about 30 minutes of peace. For 30 minutes I was not distracted by laundry, cooking, cleaning, changing diapers, talking on the phone, internet, places to go, marriage, whining kids, crying newborn!

I took the kids to Burke Lake yesterday morning. It is a beautiful lake with a 4.8 mile trail around it. I love to walk/run around it but haven't been able to since being pregnant (need a bathroom sooner than that). Yesterday, Erik played at the park while I fed Lainey. About 9:45 we took off around the trail. Erik had been awake since 5:30 that morning so he fell asleep along with Elaina. Ahh!

So for 30 minutes while running, slowly, I was able to just enjoy the beauty surrounding me. No requests for a lollipop, no crying, no bombarding thoughts. It was truly peaceful! What a luxorious feeling! At that moment I felt as though I had no concerns or worries and all was right with the world. I was actually able to run 3.5 miles without stopping (first postpartum run) because I was not distracted by thoughts of, "Boy, this is painful!" Instead, I just enjoyed my surroundings.

30 minutes in though my peaceful moment was over when my cell phone rang bringing me back to earth. After that I started noticing all the weird people going around the lake with me. First, I passed 2 men walking their perfectly normal bikes around the lake. Behind them was man walking on the gravel path with no shoes -- he was carrying them.

Soon after that Erik woke up crabby and my peaceful moment was a thing of the past. Hopefully, it won't be too long before my next one.

When do you feel most at peace?